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Birthdays and Getting Older

This past weekend I celebrated by 27th birthday. One common theme hit me hard – getting older isn’t easy.

I woke up without setting an alarm and enjoyed a relaxing hour  in bed. The hubby delivered me Starbucks and one of my favorite pastries that I NEVER splurge on, a chocolate croissant. We watched TV, played online and talked to my parents who called with their own birthday wishes.

I had scheduled a 5K for that morning but, unfortunately due to the snow, they had moved it to the 22nd. I really wanted to run but I just couldn’t convince myself to change out of my warm pajamas to trudge through snow, ice and a blasting head wind. My running zest has returned, but not when it means risking injury or sickness!

I finally dragged myself from the bed to the couch, and spent the remainder of the day there until I needed to shower and get ready. The night included apps and beer with some friends followed by dinner with the few that decided to stay out the extra hour. I was home and in bed by 10:30.

The strange part? Despite all the ‘celebration’ throughout the day, it never actually felt like my birthday.

Life is great. I have a husband who loves me to pieces and will do anything to show it, a stable job (despite what my feelings towards it may be), family, friends, health, a spiritual path, and plenty of other things going for me. How do I still feel incomplete, unable to truly appreciate all the blessings that life has handed me?

So for the next undetermined amount of time, I’m going to do some soul-searching. More yoga, more positive words, positive thoughts and actions and really just bringing life back to its most raw and simple point. Because, let’s be honest, if I can’t find passion and happiness from things in their most uncomplicated state, clearly I shouldn’t be searching for happiness there at all.

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