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For Meg

I’ve taken a lot of time to think about how I was going to approach this blog post.

I’ve been through every possible emotion over the last five days, not the least of which being pure sorrow for so many others. I weep for each of you impacted by her loss and fail to find the words to adequately express that sorrow other than ‘I’m truly, deeply sorry.’

Well. Here we go.

Dear Meg,

We’ve never met, but after this week, I feel like I know everything about you. You’re the type of woman I look up to. A woman who puts her family first – along side God – and values being a Mom. A woman who knows what kind of dedication it takes to be a great runner. A true friend who listens and cares and feels. The type of friend who people know they can rely on at any time of day or night. A wife who supports her husband in the most real and Godly way. A truly Christian woman and being. You’re the type of person I would be honored to run in the same circle with, both metaphorically and literally.

There are no words strong or deep enough to adequately describe the impact of your loss. Right this moment, my eyes are tearing up thinking of your beautiful children, your loving husband and the many friends that have been left behind. A void has been left in hundreds of hearts that may never heal.

I found myself calling out to God, as I know so many others have, to ask how this could have happened. How could He take such a wonderful being from this earth? How could He take you? I immediately felt selfish. While we rarely understand His plan at the exact moment we’d like, He has just that – a plan. And for just a moment, that sentiment is enough to calm the churning of my stomach.

As I laid in bed this week, so many questions raced across my mind. How do we runners go on? How do we continue knowing this could happen to any of us, at any time, and in any place? How do we manage to overcome the fear that, understandably, paralyzes some and drives others? How do we go on without YOU, our friend, our partner, our family? I offer up the only answer I can – we run. We run far and hard. We run together and as individuals. We run for you, your family and your friends. 70,000 strong, all over the world, we run. We run to bring awareness to the person you were, the person you are and the person you always will be. We run, praying, that this doesn’t happen again and to show the world that the decisions we make don’t just impact us, they impact every single person we cross paths with.

Tomorrow, i’ll be taking to the trails for my first race this year and you will be top of mind. I want to take in every brush of bush, every crunch of leaf and every whisper of the wind along the four mile course. I want to feel one with the earth and, for a moment, experience completely unscathed peace.

Meg, you will forever be on my heart, and I thank you for that. 

Rest in Peace, sweet soul.

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